Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Got Milk?
Nursing has most definitely been the most thought about part of this little girls life (by momma) before her arrival. And considering she's only a week old, its probably been the most thought about part of her life, post arrival also. It has most definitely had its ups and downs, but overall I'm giving it a huge UP!
My babies are born with recessed chins, whatever that means. In the nursing world, it means they don't latch well. In Violets case, she doesn't like to open up very wide, and when she does she clamps down very fast. Combine that with the angle of her chin and it makes nursing a challenge, to say the least.
Benjamin had the same "issue". As a first time mom, I freaked. I panicked it wasn't working, and that he wasn't getting food. I started the bottle too early, and I didn't select a good bottle/nipple for dual nursing and bottle feeding. Oh, and I didn't pump frequently, or even regularly when I bottle fed. Long story short, my supply never got built up, he became used to the faster flow of bottles, and it was an uphill battle from day one.
Back to Violet...I was determined that whatever the cost, she was going to get breast milk only for the first few months (health and cost), and we were going to make it work...And I'm happy to say, that I think that after a week, we're almost there!
Today was the first day I can say that I'm not wincing in pain when she attaches, and also the first day that she has eaten consistently on both sides, and for longer than 10 minutes. My supply is out of control, and I think we may come out victorious! The nurses were very helpful and the most helpful thing was actually in them agreeing with me that she is tricky to figure out, and not a very easy nurser. Knowing that others see my struggle and that I wasn't "bad at it" gave me enough encouragement to keep going! I cheated many times, and still don't do things "by the book", but its working great for us, and that is a huge blessing.
I don't think that nursing is the same for every mom, or even every baby, so who knows how it will go if there is a next time, but it will be nice to not need to carry around a sheild with me, or even formula or a bottle right now. (not that we have really gone anywhere) We'll see how I do eventually when I try to nurse in public, without wincing in pain, or unsuccessfully hiding under the cover. I think I'll stay a hermit in my house just a little longer!
My babies are born with recessed chins, whatever that means. In the nursing world, it means they don't latch well. In Violets case, she doesn't like to open up very wide, and when she does she clamps down very fast. Combine that with the angle of her chin and it makes nursing a challenge, to say the least.
Benjamin had the same "issue". As a first time mom, I freaked. I panicked it wasn't working, and that he wasn't getting food. I started the bottle too early, and I didn't select a good bottle/nipple for dual nursing and bottle feeding. Oh, and I didn't pump frequently, or even regularly when I bottle fed. Long story short, my supply never got built up, he became used to the faster flow of bottles, and it was an uphill battle from day one.
Back to Violet...I was determined that whatever the cost, she was going to get breast milk only for the first few months (health and cost), and we were going to make it work...And I'm happy to say, that I think that after a week, we're almost there!
Today was the first day I can say that I'm not wincing in pain when she attaches, and also the first day that she has eaten consistently on both sides, and for longer than 10 minutes. My supply is out of control, and I think we may come out victorious! The nurses were very helpful and the most helpful thing was actually in them agreeing with me that she is tricky to figure out, and not a very easy nurser. Knowing that others see my struggle and that I wasn't "bad at it" gave me enough encouragement to keep going! I cheated many times, and still don't do things "by the book", but its working great for us, and that is a huge blessing.
I don't think that nursing is the same for every mom, or even every baby, so who knows how it will go if there is a next time, but it will be nice to not need to carry around a sheild with me, or even formula or a bottle right now. (not that we have really gone anywhere) We'll see how I do eventually when I try to nurse in public, without wincing in pain, or unsuccessfully hiding under the cover. I think I'll stay a hermit in my house just a little longer!
The Name
VIOLET: Momma has loved this name for about 4 or 5 years. Its pretty. Its feminine. Its not too cutesy. Its elegant and royal. Its not weird, but still semi unique. It starts with a "V", and I'm partial to "v's". I LOVE IT!
ANN: Daddy came up with Ann. He loves the name, and loves the way it sounds with Violet. He also loves the name Grace, and even more the definition of grace. Well, Hannah means grace, and Anna is the Anglo Saxton form of Hannah. And that's what solidified Anna!
ELOISE: Who says you can't have two middle names! I actually prefer to think of it as 1st 2nd 3rd and 4th. Well Momma's given name at birth is Victoria Louise Van Wyhe. Daddy didn't know what he thought about using Van Wyhe as a middle name,(he's not against my family, he just thinks it sounds weird). Victoria would be confusing to have as another first, and didn't sound good as a middle, and so Louise seemed to be the "go to" portion of the name that would be familial. Well, Eloise is a form of Louise, and we liked the sound of it better with Violet Ann. So, Violet Ann Eloise it was!
ANN: Daddy came up with Ann. He loves the name, and loves the way it sounds with Violet. He also loves the name Grace, and even more the definition of grace. Well, Hannah means grace, and Anna is the Anglo Saxton form of Hannah. And that's what solidified Anna!
ELOISE: Who says you can't have two middle names! I actually prefer to think of it as 1st 2nd 3rd and 4th. Well Momma's given name at birth is Victoria Louise Van Wyhe. Daddy didn't know what he thought about using Van Wyhe as a middle name,(he's not against my family, he just thinks it sounds weird). Victoria would be confusing to have as another first, and didn't sound good as a middle, and so Louise seemed to be the "go to" portion of the name that would be familial. Well, Eloise is a form of Louise, and we liked the sound of it better with Violet Ann. So, Violet Ann Eloise it was!
VIOLET ANN ELOISE LEWICKI
Labor: the non-memory
LABOR:
I hadn't been able to sleep well for weeks (if not months) and the night before Violet's delivery was no exception. It had been a busy busy Monday. Knowing that you are going to deliver a baby, for sure, the next day, is a very weird feeling. We had many errands, and To Do Jobs around the house. I got started on my part of the list at 4 a.m., and when a nap didn't happen in the afternoon (go figure, I had a little adrenaline pumping), I was surprised that I still didn't get to sleep till after 10 on Monday night.
I woke up again at 4 Tuesday morning and showered and took my sweet time getting ready. There is a lot of pressure getting ready to have a baby. First of all there is the simple fact that its a big event you're getting ready for...an event that will have lots of pictures. So whether its your hair or what you wear on the way to the hospital, you can't claim that you were caught off guard or that it was the middle of the night. Those pictures will haunt you the rest of your life, if you're not careful!
At about 6:20, Benjamin began to stir, and I went to get him out of his crib "for the last time" as my only baby. I was SUPER emotional, and thankfully our friends showed up shortly after that (they were watching Benjamin for the day) so I had to pull it together fast.
We got to the hospital (After getting Joel some McDonalds for breakfast) and started to get all situated in our AWESOME room. (It was the biggest one!) The next hour was just full of formalities, paperwork, and other similar things. Joel tried to get us situated in the room, and I tried to wrap my mind around the idea that we were going to meet our baby soon. Our nurse was awesome and it was a great experience.
The rest of the facts are fuzzy, and possibly not accurate. But, to my recollection:
Dr. Beer came in to break my water around 8:30. Then the waiting game began! We walked, rested, walked, rested, sat on the bouncy ball, ect...I don't remember a lot of details except thinking, "If Pitocin would just speed this up, then why the heck am I wasting time walking! Lets get this show on the road!"
Well, my nurse checked me at 11ish. I had been having very low intensity, irregular contractions, and nothing seemed to be happening. The plan was for Dr. Beer to come check me around 12:00, and get me started on Pitocin. However, the nurse left around 11:30, and as soon as she left the room my body kicked into delivery mode. Seriously. I began having 30 second contractions 1 1/2 minutes apart. Joel was a great time keeper. The were not very fun, and I began to be sad that I had wished for them to come. We called the nurse back into the room after 15 or so minutes, and she checked things out. I had dilated to a 5. I decided to get some drugs to help take the edge off (not as strong as an epidural), and this is where the details get VERY blurred!
After a little while the wimpy pain killer was not impressing me, and I said I might want an Epidural. Joel didn't think I needed one (I have a pretty high pain tolerance and pretty fast labors) but a couple contractions after he encouraged me not have the Epidural, I vetoed him and called for the shot! I was dilated to a 6 at this point.
The "Epidural guy" seemed to take forever, but eventually arrived and proceeded. Here are the only memories I have of the next 1/2 hr...He was telling me to sit on the edge of bed and lean forward, which I tried to do. He was kinda taking a long time and before I knew it I was laying on the edge of the bed on my side. He was trying to get me sit up so he could finish the Epidural, and the nurse was telling me to stop pushing. I did not consciously lay down, nor did I know that I was pushing. I just knew I was feeling A LOT of pain. I kept apologizing saying that I didn't mean to push, and the nurse was calling my OB telling her to hurry up and get back to the hospital. I now know she was kinda holding my baby in, trying to slow down the process.
When Dr. Beer got there I think I pushed three times before deciding that I was going to have to tell them that I didn't want to do it anymore, and they would just have to get her out of me via C-Section. I thought I had a high pain tolerance, but although I don't remember the experience well, I do remember thinking that there could be no positive ending at that point. I told them I couldn't do it any more, and she held up 1/2 my baby girl and said I didn't have a choice and had to give one more push to finish delivering...seeing my beautiful purple (literally) baby gave me just enough motivation to finish the job. I pushed, she cried, and I can now say that I've had a baby without an Epidural (It wasn't able to take effect).
I was a little loopy after that. I was really concerned about her color (which was fine) and Joel tells me she cried right away, but I didn't know it, and I thought the moments afterward, she was way too quite, which also concerned me. I had an IV in my hand that couldn't come out for a while and it really really drove me nuts. After the first couple minutes of me thinking that Violet was too quite, she began to cry, and didn't stop for a couple hours. again - literally. They think that she had a head ache from the birth canal, and that caused her tears. My inability to hold her comfortably (the IV) and her sadness made this momma pretty uneasy the first few hours. Plus I think I understood correctly that there were some effects of the drugs I had "sort of" taken.
Overall, it was a great delivery. It was great because it was fast, because I didn't really tear at all, and because I have already blocked the awful parts!. She was here, she was healthy and after a couple hours, I felt great!
I hadn't been able to sleep well for weeks (if not months) and the night before Violet's delivery was no exception. It had been a busy busy Monday. Knowing that you are going to deliver a baby, for sure, the next day, is a very weird feeling. We had many errands, and To Do Jobs around the house. I got started on my part of the list at 4 a.m., and when a nap didn't happen in the afternoon (go figure, I had a little adrenaline pumping), I was surprised that I still didn't get to sleep till after 10 on Monday night.
I woke up again at 4 Tuesday morning and showered and took my sweet time getting ready. There is a lot of pressure getting ready to have a baby. First of all there is the simple fact that its a big event you're getting ready for...an event that will have lots of pictures. So whether its your hair or what you wear on the way to the hospital, you can't claim that you were caught off guard or that it was the middle of the night. Those pictures will haunt you the rest of your life, if you're not careful!
At about 6:20, Benjamin began to stir, and I went to get him out of his crib "for the last time" as my only baby. I was SUPER emotional, and thankfully our friends showed up shortly after that (they were watching Benjamin for the day) so I had to pull it together fast.
We got to the hospital (After getting Joel some McDonalds for breakfast) and started to get all situated in our AWESOME room. (It was the biggest one!) The next hour was just full of formalities, paperwork, and other similar things. Joel tried to get us situated in the room, and I tried to wrap my mind around the idea that we were going to meet our baby soon. Our nurse was awesome and it was a great experience.
The rest of the facts are fuzzy, and possibly not accurate. But, to my recollection:
Dr. Beer came in to break my water around 8:30. Then the waiting game began! We walked, rested, walked, rested, sat on the bouncy ball, ect...I don't remember a lot of details except thinking, "If Pitocin would just speed this up, then why the heck am I wasting time walking! Lets get this show on the road!"
Well, my nurse checked me at 11ish. I had been having very low intensity, irregular contractions, and nothing seemed to be happening. The plan was for Dr. Beer to come check me around 12:00, and get me started on Pitocin. However, the nurse left around 11:30, and as soon as she left the room my body kicked into delivery mode. Seriously. I began having 30 second contractions 1 1/2 minutes apart. Joel was a great time keeper. The were not very fun, and I began to be sad that I had wished for them to come. We called the nurse back into the room after 15 or so minutes, and she checked things out. I had dilated to a 5. I decided to get some drugs to help take the edge off (not as strong as an epidural), and this is where the details get VERY blurred!
After a little while the wimpy pain killer was not impressing me, and I said I might want an Epidural. Joel didn't think I needed one (I have a pretty high pain tolerance and pretty fast labors) but a couple contractions after he encouraged me not have the Epidural, I vetoed him and called for the shot! I was dilated to a 6 at this point.
The "Epidural guy" seemed to take forever, but eventually arrived and proceeded. Here are the only memories I have of the next 1/2 hr...He was telling me to sit on the edge of bed and lean forward, which I tried to do. He was kinda taking a long time and before I knew it I was laying on the edge of the bed on my side. He was trying to get me sit up so he could finish the Epidural, and the nurse was telling me to stop pushing. I did not consciously lay down, nor did I know that I was pushing. I just knew I was feeling A LOT of pain. I kept apologizing saying that I didn't mean to push, and the nurse was calling my OB telling her to hurry up and get back to the hospital. I now know she was kinda holding my baby in, trying to slow down the process.
When Dr. Beer got there I think I pushed three times before deciding that I was going to have to tell them that I didn't want to do it anymore, and they would just have to get her out of me via C-Section. I thought I had a high pain tolerance, but although I don't remember the experience well, I do remember thinking that there could be no positive ending at that point. I told them I couldn't do it any more, and she held up 1/2 my baby girl and said I didn't have a choice and had to give one more push to finish delivering...seeing my beautiful purple (literally) baby gave me just enough motivation to finish the job. I pushed, she cried, and I can now say that I've had a baby without an Epidural (It wasn't able to take effect).
Overall, it was a great delivery. It was great because it was fast, because I didn't really tear at all, and because I have already blocked the awful parts!. She was here, she was healthy and after a couple hours, I felt great!
The decision to induce...
Here is the first of many posts to keep some record of the our sweet baby Violet Ann's arrival. I'll start with the decision to induce.
After my OB surprised me at 37 weeks, with the option of starting labor one week before my due date, my head began to swim. There seemed to be so many pros and cons, many of them that were quite personal, and there were so many opinions floating around, mostly against the idea. I became a little stressed about it, and decided to take the next two Dr. Apts to decide.
There was no clear cut reasons why we made the decision to schedule the induction, but a lot of little factors played a role. Most probably would assume that my main reasons was either wanting to meet my little girl, or just not wanting to be pregnant any more. Although I can't deny either of those facts, they were two of the smallest pieces of the puzzle. The first was very simple: I wanted Dr. Beer to deliver my baby. Without it scheduled, my odds weren't good. Also, students were gone that week, and that meant Joel's schedule could be cleared much easier. Another convincing factor was that any Dr., midwife, or nurse that I talked to agreed that my cervix was incredibly favorable for an induction, that combined with my last delivery, Dr. Beer felt there weren't any more risks of a C-Section, or even needing Pitocin, if I waited to go into labor or scheduled to induce. In my situation "being induced" simply meant that my OB would break my water, and then let nature do its thing. This was also great news to me. Those are the "good reasons" that I gave myself, and Joel, for wanting to schedule her birthday. There were also some "other reasons"...
I really wanted a baby on Thanksgiving. There were many reasons Thanksgiving was going to be a little uncharacteristic this year, (my sisters were at their in-laws, I wouldn't be able to travel either way, etc...) and to help me not be sad about these facts and more, I really wanted to have my baby to distract me. I also really loved that my OB was honest and told me her reason to induce me was simply that I was a "great candidate" for it, and it meant she got to delivery my baby...and after taking me all the way from A to Z with Benjamin, and getting to be my Dr. the whole time with baby #2, she wanted to deliver her. I liked that. And last but not least (I can't believe I'm admitting this...) was the mistake I made in asking for people's opinions. After being bombarded with "don't induce" advice, the evil Tori came out and made me want to do just that.
So I did. I'm so glad I did. Labor "went great"! and I don't regret a thing...but more on the Labor later!
After my OB surprised me at 37 weeks, with the option of starting labor one week before my due date, my head began to swim. There seemed to be so many pros and cons, many of them that were quite personal, and there were so many opinions floating around, mostly against the idea. I became a little stressed about it, and decided to take the next two Dr. Apts to decide.
There was no clear cut reasons why we made the decision to schedule the induction, but a lot of little factors played a role. Most probably would assume that my main reasons was either wanting to meet my little girl, or just not wanting to be pregnant any more. Although I can't deny either of those facts, they were two of the smallest pieces of the puzzle. The first was very simple: I wanted Dr. Beer to deliver my baby. Without it scheduled, my odds weren't good. Also, students were gone that week, and that meant Joel's schedule could be cleared much easier. Another convincing factor was that any Dr., midwife, or nurse that I talked to agreed that my cervix was incredibly favorable for an induction, that combined with my last delivery, Dr. Beer felt there weren't any more risks of a C-Section, or even needing Pitocin, if I waited to go into labor or scheduled to induce. In my situation "being induced" simply meant that my OB would break my water, and then let nature do its thing. This was also great news to me. Those are the "good reasons" that I gave myself, and Joel, for wanting to schedule her birthday. There were also some "other reasons"...
I really wanted a baby on Thanksgiving. There were many reasons Thanksgiving was going to be a little uncharacteristic this year, (my sisters were at their in-laws, I wouldn't be able to travel either way, etc...) and to help me not be sad about these facts and more, I really wanted to have my baby to distract me. I also really loved that my OB was honest and told me her reason to induce me was simply that I was a "great candidate" for it, and it meant she got to delivery my baby...and after taking me all the way from A to Z with Benjamin, and getting to be my Dr. the whole time with baby #2, she wanted to deliver her. I liked that. And last but not least (I can't believe I'm admitting this...) was the mistake I made in asking for people's opinions. After being bombarded with "don't induce" advice, the evil Tori came out and made me want to do just that.
So I did. I'm so glad I did. Labor "went great"! and I don't regret a thing...but more on the Labor later!
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
She's here!
Violet Ann Eloise Lewicki
Announcing the arrival of...
Miss Violet Ann Eloise Lewicki.
Violet is doing great! Momma is feeling amazing, and Daddy has been a huge help!
I'll be sure to write more about the awkward day before induction, the day of labor, and the actual delivery later when I'm not busy staring at my little girl, but for now I'll wet your appetite with pictures of her beautiful face! Overall, D-day went great, the labor was fast, and she's been great ever since. We're excited to spend the day falling more and more in love with her, and can't wait to be a family of four tomorrow with both our babies...Big and Small!
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Saturday November 20th
Hello Miss Littler,
Its 4:15ish a.m., Sunday morning, as I begin to write this. I've mentioned that I'm not sleeping well, and although the last two mornings I've made it till 5:30, this morning my eyes popped open at 3:45 and stayed that way. I'm hoping to get back to sleep by 5!
Last night we finally found a sitter and Dad and I went out to eat at the Spice, and favorite Thai restaurant in Ames. It was so very much fun reconnecting with our friends Brian and Sarah, and my Massaman chicken was AMAZING! I asked for some some sauce to help spice it up a bit to see if I could coax you out, and although you seemed to notice "the heat" it resulted in you having a little party in my tummy last night, not in jumping your cute bones out here. Shux!
Yesterday we had a much needed family day, and were lazy quite a bit of the morning, and hung out with Benjamin, made some plans for how to rearrange the basement, watched a new movie, the Bee movie, with Benjamin, and continued to get ready for you! In the afternoon your brother took another 3+ hour nap, and i went to Hobby Lobby to get some supplies for some hair ribbons for you, and then went to the grocery store to stock up on groceries for the week. Your dad started to clean out the van, and garage and made some great progress!
Hopefully today is relaxing and we make it to the mall and/or WalMart for some much needed walking! and hopefully I'll get your bassinete sheets on and re-situate the bedroom a little!
Happy Sunday!
Love you!
Momma
Its 4:15ish a.m., Sunday morning, as I begin to write this. I've mentioned that I'm not sleeping well, and although the last two mornings I've made it till 5:30, this morning my eyes popped open at 3:45 and stayed that way. I'm hoping to get back to sleep by 5!
Last night we finally found a sitter and Dad and I went out to eat at the Spice, and favorite Thai restaurant in Ames. It was so very much fun reconnecting with our friends Brian and Sarah, and my Massaman chicken was AMAZING! I asked for some some sauce to help spice it up a bit to see if I could coax you out, and although you seemed to notice "the heat" it resulted in you having a little party in my tummy last night, not in jumping your cute bones out here. Shux!
Yesterday we had a much needed family day, and were lazy quite a bit of the morning, and hung out with Benjamin, made some plans for how to rearrange the basement, watched a new movie, the Bee movie, with Benjamin, and continued to get ready for you! In the afternoon your brother took another 3+ hour nap, and i went to Hobby Lobby to get some supplies for some hair ribbons for you, and then went to the grocery store to stock up on groceries for the week. Your dad started to clean out the van, and garage and made some great progress!
Hopefully today is relaxing and we make it to the mall and/or WalMart for some much needed walking! and hopefully I'll get your bassinete sheets on and re-situate the bedroom a little!
Happy Sunday!
Love you!
Momma
Friday, November 19, 2010
Friday November 19th
Miss Littler,
Well today is the day I originally said I wanted you to arrive. I have definitely had a lot of contractions, but none that are labor producing. Some might say that you're just too cozy to leave, but by your constant stretching and vicious movements, I have a hard time believing that your comfy. I for sure am not, and tonight you've been playing around a nerve that is making me want to cry. I won't keep requesting that you come out this weekend, if you just leave that nerve alone!
Today I had my 39 week apt and we made the decision that if you don't surprise us with your presence this weekend, we'll induce labor on Tuesday. There are a lot of reasons for our final decision and I feel uncharacteristically calm about it. My body/cervix is looking extremely favorable for induction, and my OB is extremely confident in the decision. There are always "what ifs" and unpredictable situations, but in my case there aren't really any more negative possibilities one way or the other. I'm excited to see you, I'm excited to not be pregnant, I'm excited to have Dr. Beer deliver you, I'm excited to show you off Thanksgiving weekend, and I'm excited to have a plan for your brother so that for two days I can just fall in love with you, and know that he's very well cared for! With my specific pregnancy she thinks I have about a 35% chance of needing pitocin, and I think I had it with Benjamin and did just fine. I have extremely low odds of having delivery end up with a C-Section, and that makes me feel great. The final straw was how much Dr. Beer really wants to be the one to deliver you, and I loved having her deliver Benjamin so I'm excited for her to help me welcome you!
I celebrated having made a decision with some downtown deli for lunch, and this afternoon your brother and I just hung out, did some laundry and made cookies for your dad and a college student. We chose a new (2nd) color finish for the floor downstairs, and it is much better. I'm excited to get it finished!
Our original plan was to go to some friends house for the evening, but all our kiddos were kinda sickly and rather than pass it back and forth, we decided to just postpone. Then we made a trip to Altoona (35 minutes) to get some more paint, and get your dad a jacket. Our night was very low keyed and after Dad finished the floor, and we ate some homemade pizza, we read to Benjamin, put him to bed, and started a puzzle (with yummy tea and Christmas music). We found out we were missing some of the edge pieces so we quit the puzzle project, but it was fun for a while!
We have a little more work to down stairs, and a double date tomorrow night to one of my favorite restaurants so if you want you can come tomorrow but even better you could come late tomorrow night or Sunday- that would be awesome. No pressure.
See you soon!
momma
Well today is the day I originally said I wanted you to arrive. I have definitely had a lot of contractions, but none that are labor producing. Some might say that you're just too cozy to leave, but by your constant stretching and vicious movements, I have a hard time believing that your comfy. I for sure am not, and tonight you've been playing around a nerve that is making me want to cry. I won't keep requesting that you come out this weekend, if you just leave that nerve alone!
Today I had my 39 week apt and we made the decision that if you don't surprise us with your presence this weekend, we'll induce labor on Tuesday. There are a lot of reasons for our final decision and I feel uncharacteristically calm about it. My body/cervix is looking extremely favorable for induction, and my OB is extremely confident in the decision. There are always "what ifs" and unpredictable situations, but in my case there aren't really any more negative possibilities one way or the other. I'm excited to see you, I'm excited to not be pregnant, I'm excited to have Dr. Beer deliver you, I'm excited to show you off Thanksgiving weekend, and I'm excited to have a plan for your brother so that for two days I can just fall in love with you, and know that he's very well cared for! With my specific pregnancy she thinks I have about a 35% chance of needing pitocin, and I think I had it with Benjamin and did just fine. I have extremely low odds of having delivery end up with a C-Section, and that makes me feel great. The final straw was how much Dr. Beer really wants to be the one to deliver you, and I loved having her deliver Benjamin so I'm excited for her to help me welcome you!
I celebrated having made a decision with some downtown deli for lunch, and this afternoon your brother and I just hung out, did some laundry and made cookies for your dad and a college student. We chose a new (2nd) color finish for the floor downstairs, and it is much better. I'm excited to get it finished!
Our original plan was to go to some friends house for the evening, but all our kiddos were kinda sickly and rather than pass it back and forth, we decided to just postpone. Then we made a trip to Altoona (35 minutes) to get some more paint, and get your dad a jacket. Our night was very low keyed and after Dad finished the floor, and we ate some homemade pizza, we read to Benjamin, put him to bed, and started a puzzle (with yummy tea and Christmas music). We found out we were missing some of the edge pieces so we quit the puzzle project, but it was fun for a while!
We have a little more work to down stairs, and a double date tomorrow night to one of my favorite restaurants so if you want you can come tomorrow but even better you could come late tomorrow night or Sunday- that would be awesome. No pressure.
See you soon!
momma
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Thursday November 18th
Miss Littler,
Last night was a great night and although I have slept horribly the last two-six months, I took 2 Tylenol PM's, and slept a solid 9 hours. It was fantastic. Your daddy is busy re-finishing our basement floor this week, in hopes to have it done before your arrival. (The basement flooded this spring and the carpet was ruined.) Yesterday the fumes he was using were strong and not good for Benjamin or you to be around, so he and I ran errands ALL day. from 9:30a.m.- 6:30p.m. I was SO TIRED.
Today was much less eventful, and I was thankful for that. This morning your brother and I had a play date/brunch at Miss Kari's house (with Eva, Edward and Miss Bekah) It was so great to see them again, and Benjamin had so much fun. It was fun getting to talk about the "plans" (or lack thereof) for your arrival, and also a great reminder how thankful I am that God has given you to me the past 8 months.
This afternoon, I took a long nap, which I haven't done in a while, and Benjamin took a much longer one. 3.5 hrs! (I hope you take after his sleep schedule!) I also started to get some things ready for the hospital. Today contractions have returned (they were very frequent week 34-37, but kinda slowed down), so I thought I should probably get ready! My lower back hurts so very bad, and I know your in position to come meet me any time, but unfortunately that doesn't mean you will anytime soon. Guess I'll just have to work on patience.
Well, your dad is at Nav Nite tonight and Benjamin went to sleep around 7:15, so I've just been looking up information on labor induction, and playing solitaire. We have a Dr. Apt tomorrow and our plan is make a decision about whether or not to be induced. There aren't very many people that think its a good idea, but I'm not sure what the best decision is for us. It will be as much of a surprise to me as it will be to everyone else, as to what your daddy and I decide! who knows maybe you'll just come tonight and we won't even have to make a decision! (although I'd rather you wait till Saturday...)
Last night was a great night and although I have slept horribly the last two-six months, I took 2 Tylenol PM's, and slept a solid 9 hours. It was fantastic. Your daddy is busy re-finishing our basement floor this week, in hopes to have it done before your arrival. (The basement flooded this spring and the carpet was ruined.) Yesterday the fumes he was using were strong and not good for Benjamin or you to be around, so he and I ran errands ALL day. from 9:30a.m.- 6:30p.m. I was SO TIRED.
Today was much less eventful, and I was thankful for that. This morning your brother and I had a play date/brunch at Miss Kari's house (with Eva, Edward and Miss Bekah) It was so great to see them again, and Benjamin had so much fun. It was fun getting to talk about the "plans" (or lack thereof) for your arrival, and also a great reminder how thankful I am that God has given you to me the past 8 months.
This afternoon, I took a long nap, which I haven't done in a while, and Benjamin took a much longer one. 3.5 hrs! (I hope you take after his sleep schedule!) I also started to get some things ready for the hospital. Today contractions have returned (they were very frequent week 34-37, but kinda slowed down), so I thought I should probably get ready! My lower back hurts so very bad, and I know your in position to come meet me any time, but unfortunately that doesn't mean you will anytime soon. Guess I'll just have to work on patience.
Well, your dad is at Nav Nite tonight and Benjamin went to sleep around 7:15, so I've just been looking up information on labor induction, and playing solitaire. We have a Dr. Apt tomorrow and our plan is make a decision about whether or not to be induced. There aren't very many people that think its a good idea, but I'm not sure what the best decision is for us. It will be as much of a surprise to me as it will be to everyone else, as to what your daddy and I decide! who knows maybe you'll just come tonight and we won't even have to make a decision! (although I'd rather you wait till Saturday...)
Dear miss littler
Miss Littler,
As I look back on records that I've kept of the beginning of your big brothers life, I am sadly greeted by vague details of the events and emotions that led up to his grand entrance. Unfortunately my memory serves as no better collector of memories. There are things that I had for Benjamin's pregnancy (pregnancy photos, pregnancy calendar, etc) that I don't have for you, and I'm sorry. But hopefully this is one thing I can give you, that is unique to just you. I can't wait to hold you and put a sweet little face with a name (although right now we don't know what that precious name is!) . I hope to never take your life for granted - the time you've spent growing inside me, your anticipated arrival, and however many days God gives us together afterward.
Love you Lots
Momma
As I look back on records that I've kept of the beginning of your big brothers life, I am sadly greeted by vague details of the events and emotions that led up to his grand entrance. Unfortunately my memory serves as no better collector of memories. There are things that I had for Benjamin's pregnancy (pregnancy photos, pregnancy calendar, etc) that I don't have for you, and I'm sorry. But hopefully this is one thing I can give you, that is unique to just you. I can't wait to hold you and put a sweet little face with a name (although right now we don't know what that precious name is!) . I hope to never take your life for granted - the time you've spent growing inside me, your anticipated arrival, and however many days God gives us together afterward.
Love you Lots
Momma
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Poor Mr Happy got overlooked this week. I had his 18 month apt, and almost forgot to record it.
PREGNANCY BRAIN!
Well, we tried a new pediatrician (I was having difficulty communicating well with my old one), and we loved her. Dr. Halbur was very nice. She was great with Benjamin, as well as momma. She answered any question more than adequately and it helped that she kept telling me how great Benjamin was. She must know how to swoon new parents. :) She was confident but caring. yay!
Benjamin was 80% in head size and height, and 79% in weight - 28lbs. Perfectly proportional.
She made me laugh a little because she told me how great his speech was. I keep looking at my sisters little boy, and my friends with little girls, and think he's behind in his communication skills. But she said that she couldn't believe how much she understood of what he was telling me during the apt, and that he's very articulate. Who knew!?!
He does have at least a dozen new words, or more, since the last time I blogged about it. Notable words:
- "No no" - especially as he walks by the printer and while looking longingly at the buttons, he just mutters it to himself..or if there is anything I offer that he doesn't want.
- "Up Peas" - the first time he verbally (as opposed to signing) said Please, was when he wanted up on the bed. I told him to say "up please" and now every appropriate usage of the word please is proceeded but "up". (Much to his dads efforts to help clarify..."
- "Oops" - Sandra Boynton has a book called "Blue Hat, Green Hat" and on every page it ends with "Ooops!". Benjamin LOVES it.
- "CCcar" - We've worked hard to prevent the repetition of consonants, but he loves the "K" sound. And right now, every vehicle with wheels is a car...trucks, vans, buses, skid loaders...he loves all his "cars"
Benjamin also has an obsession with the alphabet. Any letters (and sometimes numbers) get pointed at and Benjamin starts saying/singing "o-uah-ea-ah-oh..."
He also just picked up an interest in page numbers. We often go through books, and rather than pointing at pictures and asking "wsat?", he points at the corner page numbers and looks at me wanting me to read off the numbers. It makes story time very long!
Once again, we've had more fun with Benjamin the last couple weeks than ever before. Our most notable negative is Bed time. He's been sick, off and on, and with the combination of a bad cough, runny nose, and time change (whos in charge of changing that?) I go back to his room usually, and proceed with t.v. snuggle time, and then he goes to bed. Bed time was talking 45 min or so, and last night Joel and I decided that needed to stop. After 5 or 10 minutes of crying I went in to check on him, but this time just rocked him in his room for a couple minutes. I laid him down, and 10 minutes or so later, joel went in, and did that same thing - rocking him in his room. This time he cried for just a minute or two, and then fell fast asleep. I'm guessing this will take a night or two, but hopefully quick bedtimes will return before little miss comes.
Well, thats about it. Thank heavens for a way of journaling/baby book, that I actually keep up with!
Saturday, November 13, 2010
she's out of room!
I'm down to about 3 outfits (besides yoga pants) and those three don't even fit that well. I repeat what I said when I was pregnant with Benjamin...They should not say that you are "Full Term" when you have 3 weeks to go! So much for any attempt at patience!
Friday, November 12, 2010
37 1/2 weeks
Well, I've started freaking out that this little chick will have nothing to wear, and I look at these SIMPLE pieces from Carters most evenings when I'm procrastinating other things. So yesterday I packed up Mr Benjamin headed to the mall, and made use of the Yonkers card that I had been "saving for a rainy day." Although I didn't find the "perfect going home outfit" that I was looking for, I did find these lovely basics on sale, and snatched them up! I LOVE soft and simple!
After my last post about my not-so-healthy anxiety level, I feel SO MUCH BETTER after my dr. apt. this morning. I wasn't going to schedule one because my OB had yesterday and today off, and she said it wasn't necessary I come in. But after the induction possibility and how the decision was stressing me out I knew I just needed to go in and see how things were progressing.
So I went in this morning and saw Carol - a very nice midwife. She wasn't going to do an actual check, but instead of being quite and just going home (which i would probably normally do) , I said "Sorry, thats the only reason I'm here...Could someone check things out!" She was more than happy to, and said "Wow, those contractions are doing something!"
I was dilated to 2 cm, 80 % effaced and -1. (Last week was 1 cm and 50%) I can't tell you how much peace this gave me. I don't know why, but it did. I was prepared to go in, have her tell me i was still 1 cm and 50%, and scowl at the idea of induction. But instead she talked about how this baby is ready to meet me, and I'm a great candidate for induction.
I still don't have plans to induce, and I think that we'll just let it play out, but I can't tell you the freedom and peace it gave me, knowing that I'm not a horrible person if I do decide last minute to make the 23rd "the day", and that she's more than ready to have momma hold her! (I'm crying as I type.) Speaking of being emotional, that might be the final decision maker on the 22nd! I feel as though I'm going through pre-labor depression the last few days, and I just need to take charge of these hormones!
My emotions lost it yesterday while I was driving back from the mall...I was frustrated and sad about so very many things, and then I was trying to talk myself out of being so upset, rationalizing that I was just crazy and pregnant, and as the upset part of me began to overtake the rational side of me, I caught a glimpse of Benjamin in the rear view mirror belting out (in awkward vowel sounds) a song on the radio about our God. It was such a reminder of priorities, and perspective, and love. Thanks Benjamin!
So thats that. I'm excited for this little girl, and to see how life changes, but also excited for the next two weeks. I'll try to savor life as I know it, life with just my boys, and just enjoy the excitement of anticipation.
(I said I'll try, I'm not promising anything) :)
PS: This might not be as hilarious to anyone else, but I was looking at my chart at the Dr. Office and checked out my weight last pregnancy at this stage. I knew I" loved me some potatoes" a year a half ago, but I didn't know that I "loved me some 20lbs of potatoes" more than this pregnancy. I guess diet coke played a factor too, but seriously. I couldn't stop laughing. haha
PS: This might not be as hilarious to anyone else, but I was looking at my chart at the Dr. Office and checked out my weight last pregnancy at this stage. I knew I" loved me some potatoes" a year a half ago, but I didn't know that I "loved me some 20lbs of potatoes" more than this pregnancy. I guess diet coke played a factor too, but seriously. I couldn't stop laughing. haha
Christmas haters, stay away.
Well, its November 12th, and it finally feels like fall outside. Normally by this time of the year, I'm begging Joel to let me listen to Christmas music, and put up decorations. This year, I've just been thinking about if I can get away with short sleeves outside, and have barely thought about my coat!
Well, ready or not, the holidays are near, and as of 30 seconds ago, I'm allowing myself to begin listening to Christmas music. I'm normally a "not till the week of Thanksgiving" rule person...(Although I usually make exceptions), but this year I'm afraid that with the warm weather, the arrival of Miss Littler, my sisters new baby in Dec, our unusual holiday schedule (see - before mentioned babies :) among other things, Christmas is going to get altogether ignored. And this is devestating because it usually is my happiest time of year! So as of today, I'm welcoming Peppermint Flavored mochas, Christmas music, and I might even watch a holiday movie or two.
I haven't been dealing with life's stresses very well the last week or two, and that is probably a large reason for my desire for holiday cheer. I consider myself a pretty reasonable pregnant woman. I don't hate being pregnant like some do, and I don't think I'm that overly moody...till month 9 that is. But now 8 1/2 months pregnant, I've lost it. I cry all the time, and things that have been manageable for months or year, or my whole life for that matter, are suddenly the end of the world and need to get fixed right now. So for the sake of my sanity, my children, my marriage, and happiness, LET IT SNOW! LET IT SNOW! LET IT SNOW! - or at least we can sing about it :)
![<em>MercyMe</em> - The <em>Christmas</em> Sessions [Audio CD]](http://lh4.googleusercontent.com/public/caspLY7OCgNleCAx5gIIRrWjawLD_j94LiLatWd9bl54O7T6MpsnlErkbeMGUFnHFqGbX1tXqTBgmTEhuBQmVF8nQKmXcS24kFaM4GIMYMrkknV7jyjZbBnBoGikm15zcNGzqb5yPeR8GdpFdz2C0f8ajgIUqgiFy2A=s90)
Favorite Christmas CD EVER!
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
I'm getting an itch to shop for pink...i mean white :)
I still haven't found an affordable "coming home" outfit for my little girl that i'm in love with, but I did however find some websites, and specific pieces that I can't stop looking at...After I put them all on my blog I realized how boring I am...its all white! Oh well. I can't help help it that its beautiful, girly, classic, and maybe a bit impractical. :)
This first link is just a super fun website:
TeaCollection.com/BabyGirl
Friday, November 5, 2010
little miss complicated...kind of
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These are 3 variates of the diaper bag I want. I'm thankful that I can afford about a $40 bag...but lamenting that these cost $130ish.
3 weeks and 4 Days to go until my Due Date.
CRAZY!
Today I had my 36 week apt. I think I've gained around 17 lbs, I'm measuring 36 weeks, I'm dilated to a 1 and a 1/2, and am 50% effaced.
Now for the curve ball of the day. I jokingly said that I wanted this little girl to arrive on the 19th, and a few minutes later my OB shocked me by saying, "well the 19th is a bit too early, but I'll induce you the 23rd if you want." So, I'm left with the decision of - what to do!what to do! Here are my thoughts:
- I had a great pregnancy/delivery last time...a natural progression of 1-5 cm with "intense" but bearable contractions from 5 a.m.-10:30a.m.ish...and then an epidural, hourish nap, and pushing for an hour or less...and there he was!
- I don't want to be getting home from the hospital on Thanksgiving day. If it wasn't too early, on the 19th or 20th, I would have time to still do something for Thanksgiving...but the 23rd????
- If anything didn't well, I would always be angry at myself, thinking that it was my fault for not being patient.
- I would LOVE for Joel to have 5 days with us before students come back.(vs waiting till the 30th when students are already back from break)
- I would really like to be able to make plans for Benjamin in advance...a little more controlled situation makes me feel good)
- I would like to not be pregnant much longer
- I would like knowing Dr. Beer was going to deliver my baby
- I would like to not have to decide if we were going to travel on thanksgiving with me being pregnant...if we decide not to, I may as well have the baby early and at least have a baby instead of being sad that we're not with family (we already decided we can't go to MN, but we might end up not doing Sully either. sad. )
So there you have it. I have more "pros" than "cons", but a couple of bigger "cons" that seem to even it out. Thankfully we have a couple days to decide. The other decision is whether to schedule an apt for next week. I'm technically supposed to be going every week, but my OB is home with her kids next week, and I would have to see someone else. I don't mind, but she said its not essential that I go. That makes me not want to take the time to go, have them tell me "you're weight is great, your measuring great...any questions? no? o.k., bye!" On the other hand, if I was suddenly dilated to a 3, and 75% effaced, it would make the induction decision a little easier. Wow, I'm obviously not good at making decisions lately. (And when others try to make them for me, I automatically want the other choice!)
I don't have a lot to complain about in the grand scheme of things. She is super wiggly, and that makes me pretty uncomfortable sometimes. Sleeping isn't going that great, and it doesn't help that Benjamin has had a cold and interrupting what little sleep I can find. I've started gaining weight a lot more noticeably (on the scale and in the mirror!) I am drinking a coffee a day, and maybe retaining more water. Also, rather than salads and fruit that I craved the first 6.5 months, I want meat and potatoes, and ice cream. :) My OB thinks that this little girl is long and lean, and her mommy thinks she is either very strong or very bony!
Well feel free to comment and give advice on what to do about Little Miss's arrival. Who knows! She might just decide to come the 19th on her own! (stop flipping out mom - sheila.)
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