Baby #3 Update:
After our scary bleed last week, and worrisome contractions this weekend, today was our follow up ultrasound appointment and scheduled mtg with a Physicians Assistant.
Besides our 8 week appointment (which was a routine Ultrasound) our 6 week, 10 week, 12.5 week and 13.5 week appointments have all been hoping for the best and trying not to expect the worst. (all with a necessary ultrasound) Although I have had some anxiety about each appointment, I was most uneasy about this one. This weekend, I finally sat down and tried to understand all the details that the 5 different physicians and 2 different Ultrasound Techs were conveying. And 2 things bothered me terribly. #1) what I was feeling in my abdomen was contracting, and when I had Sub-chorionic bleeding with Violet my doctor (whom I adored) was nervous about preterm labor until my 24 week appointment. #2) the term Sub Chorionic Hemorrhaging. I did my research on line (which is always dangerous, I know), and the area of bleeding was not Sub-chorionic. What we saw in the ultrasound wasn't congruent with the defn of that type of bleed, and I couldn't get over the idea that I was "mis-diagnosed"
Well today FINALLY came, and our morning was once again sent into a whirlwind when they called around 9 to ask us to reschedule from 2:30 to 10:45. (My amazing husband and this Babys loving Daddy hasn't missed an appointment and we are praying for Grace upon Grace for the "couple" of classes he's missed!) So we scurried to find a sitter, and took off.
It was a DIVINE appointment. I was so uneasy about this appointment because we were headed back to yet a different ultrasound tech, and then were to follow up with a Physicians Assistant. I only really like the UT at the location thats farthest from us, and I HATED my one appointment with a physicians assistant. I was getting someone I didn't now for both appointments. I felt like the PA was reading from a script, knew nothing about me or my baby and I couldn't understand what she was telling me. That would have been fine with my pregnancy with Benjamin. There weren't any questions to ask besides "how fast is the heart beat?", but this time, I kinda want to know whats going on. So, I kinda think God broke the ultrasound equipment to move us from our original appointment to the farther location earlier, with the ultrasound tech I love, and a real OB doctor. Sigh. So thankful.
I laid down on the chair and she found a wiggly baby right away. Relief. She also saw that I wasn't dilated in the least. Even deeper sigh of Relief. She found 4 amazingly functioning heart chambers, and perfect organs everywhere :) So then it was question time...
I explained to her my confusion and we fired questions and she answered them all with incredible insight, clear communication and sensitive Love for little lives.
She explained that the term Sub-Chorionic Bleeding is an over used term, and that I was right this was technically Sub Amniotic Bleeding. That may not seem like a big deal, but I cannot explain the amount of peace I had knowing I wasn't crazy and there was something wrong with the diagnosis. There may somewhere be a blot clot providing extra bleeding but she believes whole heartedly that my bleed is a result of the loss of my pregnancy's twin. I have miscarried, and because I am still pregnant my body is not rejecting the baby. If this had been a miscarriage of a single pregnancy they would have done a D&C if I hadn't passed the baby, but obviously can't because of my healthy pregnancy. It would be dangerous if I wasn't still pregnant, but because my body is still registering pregnant it will not fight this unborn baby, and not harm me. I will most likely continue to bleed for a while, but baby #1 is not affected at all. The bleed is under the baby which is good. Also, The placenta is right where they want it. They were concerned (which I didn't know) before because they couldn't tell where it was, but are now at ease. Lastly, my fear about my cramping and contracting was a real feeling, and not likely concern. She explained it as uterine trauma. My Uterus, a muscle, has been through a lot. Between the miscarriage and the current pregnancy, the possible blood clot and who knows what else - its tired, its sore, and its acting like your leg when you get a charlie horse. It does not seem to be labor inducing (not dilated) just alarming. We walked out of that room having seen the cutest ultrasound pictures I have ever seen, and with more understanding of this pregnancy than I even thought possible!
So what now?! Well, I am definitely feeling much better than yesterday. However we will still be VERY glad to get to 24 weeks. I am not on bed rest in the technical sense, but I am still limiting activity. I am working on accepting help, especially during this crazy period when Joel is gone so much. I am escaping the mental hold that the couch had on me ( I can get up and around without guilt) but I am aware of the fact that trauma on the fetus/uterus does provoke preterm labor. I am no longer scared of it, but I am aware, and trying to error on the side of doing less. I am thankful for some meals from my church while Joel is gone for two weeks, and maybe even some freezer meals to tide us over till our 24 week mile marker. Im not going to be rearranging the furniture, or changing the sheets by myself right now. I want to, but its just not worth the unknown cost.
I am so grateful for what God is teaching me about my pride-full tendencies, and His perfect character - in the highs and lows. What a ride this has been, and I'm sure will continue to be.
Heres that cute little nose that makes me want to learn how to accept help and little lips that I cant get enough of.
No comments:
Post a Comment